Tasks vs. Relationships

 I love to-do lists. 

  • Creating them
  • Checking things off
  • Feeling like I've accomplished something
I also love getting texts and other messages, even letters or Christmas cards from friends. The problem is, I like to feel that we can pick up those relationships from where we left off. And usually that "where we left off" is WAY too many years ago. 

I've lived in four different states over the last 40 years, and have collected friends in each of them. 

As I move, I lose that easy "keep in touch frequently because we show up at the same stuff every week" quality to the relationships. Same with my family, who all live 2 time zones away, and whom I only see in the flesh twice a year (in a non-Covid year). 

Putting a relationship building "task" on my to-do list isn't something I've done before. 

Why not? It seems easy enough to intend to connect with one person I haven't seen or heard from in a while each day, even if only for a few minutes over text in the evening on the couch. All it takes is some intention.

Is it too impersonal to treat relationship maintenance as another task on my list?

Or it is a reasonable way to build the life I want - full of interesting people I've collected over the years who I'm still close enough with to "pick things up where we left off" without needing to catch up on decades of lost time?

2021 - let's find out!


 

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